what happened to spontaneity?
why do I have to be scheduled in every time I want to see you.
we have never just met up randomly, it's always a scheduled time, fuck that.
I am so not bothered right now, this way more difficult than I had anticipated.
as I said, I am tired of fighting.
tired of not feeling like your girlfriend, or that we are together for that matter.
doesn't feel like it should, at all.

"everyone is prepared to say goodbye to their parents, but no one is prepared to say goodbye to their children"
Those are the words from Stephanie Flores' fathers mouth.
So true, and he must have so much pain.
Fuck you Joran.

love,x.

why don't you be the artist and make me out of clay

some things are left unsaid, unnoticed, untouched.
and it's fun, it's interesting, but it's also difficult.
getting caught up in the attempt at deciphering the mind, the thoughts, the feelings.
it's a dangerous art, but once you become an expert at it you reduce the amount of problems.
but for me, it's difficult sometimes. and i am also hard to read.
i am not an open book, to anyone.
i don't want to be.
and i am not going to change for you.
you are just a person i love.
you are not my controller, nor do i abide by your rules.
i have my own.
you can't tell me what i can or can't do.
i learnt the difference between right and wrong from my father, so don't try to change that.
i don't appreciate it.

i'm done fighting, every night.

love, x.